I've had a few things I wanted to post about this week but almost no time to do it.
First, I was called on to speak during a pick up meeting on Sunday of my group. I hadn't ever done this, but a woman there encouraged me to do so. I asked to be last on the list but she and the organizer put me first! I was terrified. But when I got up there, it was kind of amazing and the nervousness vanished and all I saw was supportive faces in the audience. I'm sure there were more than a few who wondered why I am there week after week without speaking. And it went okay. I don't remember a lot of what I said, but I was up there for a while and Karen, the woman who put me up to it, was ecstatic when I sat down.
Second, I think I'm going to ask Karen to sponsor me when I see her this Sunday. I still have been hanging back from that little task of getting a sponsor.
Third, I had one of those "you know you are getting used to being in the program" moments when I bought a cup of coffee yesterday and paid with a twenty, received 18 one dollar bills in change and thought "Good! 18 meetings."
Fourth, on the way home tonight, I was musing about my first love whose birthday was the other day. I haven't seen him in over twenty years (and never imagined I would ever say that). It's a long story but I often feel sad over the road not taken. (I ended the relationship. We were very young and I wanted to "experience life". HA! I realize now I wanted to party without him around putting a damper on things. Even then my disease was showing itself.) In any event, while I was feeling a little sad, a thought occurred to me--a certainty, a voice--that told me my life is exactly the way it's supposed to be and I'm with the person I'm supposed to be with. Wow!!! Revelation! I really felt it.
Anyway, tonight I am grateful for:
many months of no hangover mornings
a feeling that I am growing spiritually
that I don't have to drink anymore ever
that tomorrow is Friday and there is little planned for this weekend
that my husband is away for a couple of nights so I have some quiet after the kids go to bed