Arggh

Stupidly, I drank last night. I bought two bottles of wine. The bad news is I drank one. The good news is that I poured the other out down the drain.

I try to envision what was going through my mind. I was not fighting a craving. I could have chosen not to buy that wine. I didn' t enjoy the taste of the first bottle either. It's like I was on automatic pilot. It's Friday night, my family is away for the weekend, I always enjoy relaxing with wine when they are away which happens like never. And so I bought it. This morning I am happy that I poured the other bottle out. I am rather disgusted with my stupidity for buying it at all and drinking it. I know I don't want to drink again. There is no point. The damn stuff didn't even TASTE good. I would have enjoyed my cranberry and ginger ale more.

I will not drink today.

I am coming to realize that I need to get myself to meetings whether I think I need them or not.

Sometimes I feel stupidly out of place there. But I never drink on a day that I go to a meeting. I have to admit that.

Faith, I am a little concerned about posting this as I know you have been feeling the cravings lately too. I always worry my failure will trigger a lapse in someone else. Let's not give in to them today, okay?