hangover free morning
God, I love hangover free mornings. Mind you, I'm still bleary eyed from staying up too late finishing a difficult Sudoku last night, but it's a good bleary eyed...I also had a wild dream (this always happens to me in early sobriety) involving wars, floods, the Middle East etc...I tend to be tired after an active dream.
My gratitude list this AM:
For waking up hangover free
Sudoku (I love it!)
Leftover lobster salad in my fridge for lunch today
Living in a fairly safe area of the world (watched Spike Lee's Katrina documentary last night)
Question for my readers, especially Maui. How does one get a sponsor in AA? I've yet to figure this out. And once I have a sponsor, what am I supposed to do with her? Call every day? Work the steps? Just go to meetings?
posted by Redhead Gal at 6:13 AM
9 Comments:
good morning!!!
you sound good Red..
just keep putting one foot in front of the other..
thanks for sharing~
Funny how dreams involve so much emotion.
Exposing yourself in meetings and seeing someone that "has what you want" (of her auroa, spiritual mentorship, energy, etc) you simply go up to her and ask them if she is available to sponsor. Usually a dialog follows from them. Not everyone sponsors the same. They will tell you what they expect from you:
- having a commitment
- calling at a certain hour
- writing assignments
etc
There are times when a sponsor is not a good fit. This is hard to decide, because many times we like to sickly run our own program. The best thing is to communicate -- so easier said than done.
Pretty much you need someone to walk you thru the steps, and someone to help you get your poison out and grow closer to your HP.
There is an AA pamplet of sponsorship that you can look at. This is my experience and may differ from others. How I got my sponsor was by sharing at a meeting one time about being sponsorless and how fearful I was to ask someone. After that many women approached me and I ended up asking one of them. How we meet works for us, and I must be doing something right cuz I am still sober.
I wish you the best and hopefully more peeps will have more suggestions to follow.
SO glad you are here and asking this question btw!
Go to meetings and listen. You will "identify" with someone you hear, someone you can relate to. Someone who "has what you want."
Ask that person to sponsor you. Then follow directions.
Go to a meeting with someone. You need the support.
Good Morning. Well, I'll tell you how this sponser came to me. I'm kind of "unique" (hehe) where I have put together "years" of "sobriety" over the last 15 years. I've had 2+, 2+, 3+ and 5 now I am at 16 months. The first sponser I had was a friend I knew from High School it got me going but we were more friends than sponsor/sponsee. Then I had a big blowout in 1996 and move to where I am now. I saw this angry Mo' Fo' at a meeting and approached him and the conversation is still lengendary. I walked up and he turned around, rag on head and twirling his goatee and I said and I quote, "I don't care of your a neo Nazi will you be my sponsor. He looked at me and busted out laughing. We worked together for about 2 years of my last 5 yr run. He got me into AA, going to picnics, givin' me the eye when I was sitting too close to a girl at meetings. I trusted him and still do. But I went back out. When I got back I asked him to sponsor me again and he reluctently agreed but said I would have to work this time. I told him after 4 months that I was going to Texas to work for a month and a half and he said that he may not sponsor my when I got back because he thought it was a bad idea. It was and when I slugged back in in April of last year I asked him if he was still my sponsor. He said No but let him talk to some people and he'd get back to me. That day I got a call from this guy who I knew from around and he said he wanted to talk about sponsoring me. He is my sponsor today.
A sponsor is not a cab, bank, shrink or mother. A sponser helps you work the steps, period. What develops after that is what it is and I must say, I respect the hell out of my new sponsor as he doesn't take any guff from me and I accept that he knows more that me. He has 25 yrs. I'm a relapser. Duh.
I said all that to say, I think having a sponsor picked for you by people who know you is the best way, if you are serious. I think this because we have a tendency to pick someone we LIKE rather that someone we NEED.
Hope that helps.
Maui
Hey girl,
You sound so good. Glad to see you posting....
The sponsor I had for the first year actually picked me. I come from a small town and she knew my insanity and my family. I was a little leary of that at first, but she was a good sponsor and kept my stuff between us. Believe me if she hadn't Id have heard it. Anyway, we were friends and she was brutal for a year, absolutely brutal, but that was what I needed. She kicked my ass with love. Unfortunatley a year into it, she said something to me that showed me that our time was up. We were heading in two different directions and so we parted ways. Of course I couldnt go without a sponsor and so one was suggested to me, I latched onto her, she took me under her wing and we work together through the steps.
That said, she doesnt live to close to me and getting together lately hasn't been easy an so I am on the prowl again. A sponsor dosent have to be forever, it just has to be...if you know what I mean. We cannnot go it alone and need someone that will keep us heading in the right direction at all times.
Good luck girl...Just do it :)
Love ya
First pray, then go to meetings and listen. Pick someone with whom you identify. Someone who is talking about applying the steps in their everyday life.
Hangover free mornings ARE good no matter how tired.
Get a sponsor who knows the steps. Listen to people share and watch how they behave. You and your sponsor will work out the details. Just get someone who has strong literature based sobriety.
G~
All of the above Red.
I see you,
JJ
Post a Comment
<< Home