Friends
I talked to a friend tonight whom I have known forever and love very dearly. She is trying to quit cigarettes and she is very addicted. I actually managed to quit three plus years ago and I feel her pain.
In talking to her, I mentioned how once I quit smoking, my drinking really took off. And it really did, although this friend and I are separated by distance enough that I'm not sure she perceives a drinking problem on my part. Just partying when we get together a couple of times of year, isn't it?
I think she would be sympathetic to my not drinking, she is a wonderful friend. But I have a hard time letting go of 20 years of shared bottles of wine. Can you have intimacy with the friends ( and she is a real friend not a drinking buddy) over a seltzer? People say yes. I just don't know.
posted by Redhead Gal at 11:16 PM
2 Comments:
I know what you mean, it does seem less intimate without a drink and not something I've tried but I'm sure its possible. I think its probably practice actually! Probably easier if neither if you are drinking though, couldnt do it if the other person was drinking. I hate talking to drunks!!!!! :-) If she is a good friend it might help to confide in her re your drinking problem too, I'm sure she'd be supportive. Not something I've done much of either, its all my big secret and thats what makes it harder to beat I think.
I still can't go out with my college friends since most of them are still drinking they're STILL in college. I can't be around that kind of drinking because I want to be a part of it. On the other hand, I CAN go out to dinner with a friend and don't have a problem at all if they have a beer or a glass of wine. It's more the party atmosphere that makes me want to drink, mostly because I'm so insecure I think the drinking will somehow make me a better person. It's a tough situation for those of us with problems related to drinking, but I definitely think you could talk to this friend about it. She should understand because of how difficult quitting smoking is for her. I bet she doesn't want to be around smokers right now!!
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