Thursday, December 29, 2005

How does your higher power speak to you?

I went to a meeting last night and there was lots of gratitude and lots of thanking the HP. No offense to anyone, certainly not the people at the meeting, but it all sounded like everyone had a script that said the same thing.

So how does your HP speak to you, really? Tonight, I found a dollar bill on my dashboard as I was thinking about drinking. I thought HP, if I had one, might be telling me I should go to a meeting. Then I thought I'm dead, because I can't go to a meeting tonight, without a sitter.

What are the signs? How do you know you are not just making it up in your head?

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

A Little Prayer That Could Help?

I found this on one of the recovery blogs I visit now and then:

I pray for an open mind so I may come to believe in a Power greater than myself. I pray for humility & the continued opportunity to increase my faith. I don’t want to be crazy any more.

I think I want to substitute "addicted" for crazy. I don't feel crazy; I just feel like a drunk. I do think there is a difference. But what do I know?

I'm going to try to be active here again.

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Clarification on Previous Post

Most of the folks that I know in AA have been terrific but it's the ones that condemn me for seeking a different path, or more accurately, not being able to find a spiritual path in AA, that offend me. That's what I found offensive in Philosopher's post and by no means am I condemning everyone in AA.

HP, thank you for your good wishes. I'm sober today and believe I will be able to get through the holidays just fine.

Philosopher's comment

It's crap like that comment that really turns me and others off to AA. My pride stinks. Where's the pride problem? My not believing in a God that can make me stop drinking is pride? Also, I take issue with the notion that my thinking made me an alcoholic. Drinking to excess made me an alcoholic and not drinking is what will arrest the problem.

Crikey, I hate the "I've found God and it's the only way" baloney.

Take a hike, P. Fundamentalism is repulsive, not attractive, to AA.